| 1. | "Dad, can you write in the dark?""I think so. What is it you want me to write?""Your name on this report card."... more |
| 
|
| 2. | "If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up" said the sarcastic teacher. After a long silence, one f... more |
|
|
| 3. | "Isnt the principal a dummy!" said a boy to a girl."Say, do you know who I am?" asked the girl."No.""Im the principals d... more |
|
|
| 4. | "Its clear" said the teacher, "That you havent studied your geography. Whats your excuse?" "Well, my dad says the world... more |
|
|
| 5. | "Our teacher has a bad memory. For three days she asked us how much is two and two. We told her it was four. But she sti... more |
|
|
| 6. | A college business professor could not help but notice that one of his students was late to class for the third time tha... more |
|
|
| 7. | A history jokeTeacher: When was Rome built?Pupil: At night.Teacher: Why did you say that?Pupil: Because my Dad always sa... more |
|
|
| 8. | A linguistics professor was lecturing to his English class one day. "In English," he said, "A double negative forms a po... more |
|
|
| 9. | A little girl came home from school and said to her mother, "Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I... more |
|
|
| 10. | A little kids in school, taking a true-false test and hes flipping a coin. At the end of the test hes flipping the coin... more |
|
|
| 11. | A mom and dad were worried about their son not wanting to learn math at the school he was in, so they decided to send hi... more |
|
|
| 12. | A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to w... more |
|
|
| 13. | A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. He wore it under his... more |
|
|
| 14. | A student called up his Mom one evening from his college and asked her for some money, because he was broke.His Mother s... more |
|
|
| 15. | A student comes to a young professors office hours. She glances down the hall, closes his door, kneels pleadingly."I wou... more |
|
|
| 16. | A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, he said: "Now, student... more |
|
|
| 17. | A teacher was having trouble teaching arithmetic to one little boy. So she said, "if you reached in your right pocket an... more |
|
|
| 18. | An ideal homework excuse Teacher: Where is your homework?Pupil: I didnt do it because I didnt want to add to your alread... more |
|
|
| 19. | An ideal homework excuse Teacher: Where is your homework?Pupil: My little sister ate it!... more |
|
|
| 20. | An ideal homework excuseTeacher: Where is your homework?Pupil: I left it in my shirt and my mother put it in the washing... more |
|
|
| 21. | An ideal homework excuseTeacher: Where is your homework?Pupil: I loaned it to a friend, but he suddenly moved away... more |
|
|
| 22. | An ideal homework excuseTeacher: Where is your homework?Pupil: I put it in a safe, but lost the combination!... more |
|
|
| 23. | An ideal homework excuseTeacher: Where is your homework?Pupil: I was mugged on the way to school and the mugger took eve... more |
|
|
| 24. | An ideal homework excuseTeacher: Where is your homework?Pupil: Our furnace stopped working and we had to burn it to stop... more |
| 
|
| 25. | An ideal homework excuseTeacher: Where is your homework?Pupil: Some aliens from outer space borrowed it so they could st... more |
|
|
| 26. | Ann! the teacher shouted one day at the girl who had been daydreaming out the window. If India has the worlds second lar... more |
|
|
| 27. | Are you in the top half of your class ?No, Im one of the students who make the top half possible !... more |
|
|
| 28. | Art Teacher: The picture of the horse is good, but where is the wagon ?Pupil: The horse will draw it !... more |
|
|
| 29. | Bad timing for an excuse Teacher: Why were you late?Pupil: Sorry, teacher, I overslept.Teacher: Its three in the afterno... more |
|
|
| 30. | Be sure that you go straight home after schoolI cant, I live just round the corner !... more |
|
|
